Well, This is the first day of the week from hell. I will have to have surgery Friday, nothing serious, just getting my baby making equipment shut down. Oh yeah. Anyway, that means that I have to get the house/food/laundry situation handleable before I am down for a couple days and Commander Elk is in charge of the baby. My mom is taking the girls for the entire weekend, something that is usually only saved for birth, but she felt surgery to eliminate the chances of any more births was just as important. How funny that the first rest I will really get in four years is after surgery. Damn. They should offer low rate medicaid tubal ligation surgery right on the beach in the Bahamas....then they could just leave me out there for a couple days, send an umbrella drink cart and a lady with Darvoset in a little cup.....
So since I have had no new questions, I will answer one of the questions frequently asked to President Bush. "Mr. President, I understand that with the help of your wife, your dog Millie wrote a book. And that it has grossed $889,000 in sales. Mr President, does it make you feel just a little inferior that your dog has earned more than you this year, can write better than you, and has more public support for the next presidency than any of the incumbents so far? And, Mr. President, have you considered allowing Millie to tell you what to say in that earpiece you wear during all public appearances?"
"The answer to that question is simple. I like dogs. Does anyone have a burrito?"
Ask me a question! Just do it! Ask me a freakin question!
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15 comments:
"jesus christ"
1/4 psalms 110:6
See. That proves I'm crazy. Do you see what my offspring has written here? Do you see what he's been taught? one fourth of a Bible verse?! is that just so you can cuss under the radar??? wait a minute....isn't that 'taking a phrase out of context?' The very same thing Baptist preachers do all the time? You might be onto something, boy. Ever consider a career in the clergy?
no
And anyway.....Psalms 110? Here's what's bad, I don't even know how many Psalms there are and if you're even in the wrong there. But I do know that if you are so good at memorizing a quarter of a Bible verse, maybe you could get a scholarship to be a quarterback at some religious university. Then, if you did a half ass job at being a quarterback, would that make you, like, a sixteenth back?
NO! that would make me a half back because i did a HALF-ass job so therefore i would be promoted because i did more than a quarter-ass job. can't you put math and logic together or is your ine brain cell just too stressed?
okay boy. Now you've done it. my brain cell is dancing around on the damn keyboard typing this post. If you did a half ass job at being a quarterback, then you would have only done half as good as a regular quarterback, and anyone worth their salt in math knows that half of a quarter is a sixteenth. As far as logic is concerned, you thought you had a promotion while all along your sixteenth ass is FIRED! haha
Now wait a minute here you two. A half of a quarter is an eighth....just thought I'd, uh, point that out. Amen.
half of a quarter is a eighth. senial.
oh ha ha God you think a brain cell can type and do math at the same time while trying to parent an obviously wayward child with a drink in my hand? Dammit, why must you expect SO much?!
ine? senial? what grade are you even getting in spelling? (the correct spellings are: one and senile)
bicth
looky here boy you're grounded, dangit
you cant ground me from 500 miles away!
fine ill just go watch me some "edgycashunal televishin"
fortunately, dear readers, this is the offspring who is NOT homeschooled.
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